Just Let Me: A Melodramatic Tale of Marauder Love
by RisingStar
Summary: JamesSiriusRemus love triangle! Sirius and Remus are about to get together when James interferes. Will they be able to save their relationship? CHAPTER FOUR IS NOW UP
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:** Consider yourself warned, this is basically an excuse to have Sirius, Remus and James snog. Not much in the way of plot, but lots of angst and fluff. Leave a review and I'll give you a fresh-baked brownie:)

**Disclaimer:** Yes, we all know that JKR owns all these lovely boys, and I am merely a humble fan-writer. Do not sue; I am broke.

**WARNING:** This is SLASH. Not your ship? Get swimming. Take my word for it, you don't want to flame me for the pairings, because I can get very nasty when provoked. Innocent smile

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It had been ridiculously clear since the fourth year that Sirius Black and Remus Lupin were going to get together sooner or later. Never mind that the former was a notorious ladies' man, and never mind that the latter had never been known to do anything at all with anyone, male or female. It was clear to everyone that they looked at each other much more than friends should, that they tended to laugh a bit too hard at each other's jokes and stand just a little too close in crowded corridors. It was painfully clear that they were absolutely _dying_ to shag. Clear as daylight – to everyone but Sirius Black and Remus Lupin themselves.

Sirius never once thought about Remus in a more-than-platonic way – at least consciously (he did recall a dream in which a very familiar pair of amber eyes stared at him lustily and a well-known voice moaned his name, but that was another matter altogether). Sirius knew that no matter how many girls he shagged, it never felt quite right, but that was as far as he got with it.

Remus, on the other hand, never wondered why he automatically turned down advances from boys and girls alike. Even when he caught himself admiring the way Sirius' silky black hair hung at just the right angle – so it looked rebellious but didn't obscure his bright grey eyes – the normally-intelligent boy never put his own thoughts together.

Until one crisp autumn evening during their seventh year when all the pieces fell crashing into place. Remus, incurable insomniac, and Sirius, uncontrollable procrastinator, were sitting in the otherwise-abandoned Common Room as the hands of the clock twitched toward midnight. A window was cracked open, letting in a wonderfully fresh breeze whose chill was countered by the warmth of the crackling fire at the other end of the room. Somewhere in between these two climates sat the two boys. Sirius was hunched over a table, quill flying across the parchment while his other hand anxiously pushed his hair away from his face, looking quite uncharacteristically studious. Remus, who had long since finished the History of Magic essay that his friend was so desperately writing, lounged in an armchair a few feet away, apparently greatly absorbed in studying a point about two feet in front of his nose.

Just as the clock finished chiming for the twelfth time, Sirius dropped his quill and all but feel from his chair to sprawl rather ungracefully on the floor. Remus glanced down at his friend, an eyebrow quirking in amusement.

"Finished!" Sirius always did enjoy stating the obvious.

Remus smiled, then impulsively slid from his chair and stretched out next to the black-haired boy.

"What? Not even a 'congratulations,' Moony?"

"Congrats, Padfoot," Remus responded obediently.

"Why _thank_ you!" Sirius cried, as if Remus had just paid him an incredible compliment. "And I'll have you know I finished it a whole –" his eyes jumped to the clock "– eight hours and twenty-seven minutes before it's due."

"Impressive," came the dry reply.

A snuffle – a whine – and Sirius had flipped over so that he could look straight down at his friend. "Sometimes, Moony," he began with a tragic air, slipping into their familiar format of teasing, "I just don't think you really appreciate me."

"Padfoot, m'dear, I think you've mixed up appreciation and adoration. I appreciate you. Marisa Creevey adores you." The mousy fourth-year was the unofficial head of the unofficial Sirius Black Fan Club.

Sirius stuck his tongue out in distaste at her name. "You're right, Remus dahling," he sighed dramatically. "'Tis only you I want. Will you ever have me?"

"Hmm… I don't know," retorted Remus. "It all depends…" Suddenly their eyes met, and Remus lost track of whatever undoubtedly witty comeback he'd been making. "It, uh, depends," he stuttered, unnerved by how amazingly clear the other boy's eyes were, and how intently Sirius was gazing at him.

"Depends on what?" Sirius asked softly, going from playful to serious (no pun intended, really) like only he could do.

Remus fought a huge lump in his throat that was trying valiantly to choke him. "On… on whether or not you'll have me," he finished, not understanding what he was saying until the words were out, and then realizing it was true. He'd do anything for the black-haired god who was leaning over him, pinning him to the floor.

At that moment, Remus didn't know why he hadn't figured it out sooner. And Sirius wasn't sure how he'd never (consciously) thought of Remus before that point. And in reply, Sirius did the most logical thing he could think of: he leaned down and pressed his lips firmly to Remus', who didn't even flinch, but pressed back like he'd been expecting that all along.

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**A/N:** This is how it works: lots of review --> happy author --> new chapter faster:)


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: **Yay! Chapter 2 is up! Thanks to all my lovely reviewers; you guys are the best ever:-) The triangle begins in this installment, promise. Apologies for any typos/weird things that may have popped up in the last chapter (or will pop up in this one) - has a tendancy to change things back after I fix them, and I don't know why because I'm not that technologically-savvy. So bear with me here. Thanks all!

**Disclaimer:** If I was JKR: 1) I would own Harry Potter and all that comes with it; 2) I would not be posting on 3) Sirius would be alive and actively involved with Remus.

**WARNING:** I really hope that if you've gotten past the first chapter, you're bright enough to realize that this is SLASH. Meaning it involves men who have more-than-platonic relationships. Not your ship? Get swimming.

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The next morning at breakfast, James took one look at his two best friends – who were not-so-subtly playing footsie under the table – and turned a very flattering shade of puce. Only Peter, however, noticed that his idol looked ready to hurl all over the scrambled eggs.

"You 'kay, Prongs?" the smaller boy mumbled around a mouthful of hash browns.

James jumped. "Me? Yeah, great. Peachy. Uh, I, er, left my essay in the Tower. Yeah, I'd better run get it before class. See you, then…" And he was out the door before any of the Marauders could say a word.

"What'd he go back for?" Remus asked. "This essay?" He held up a roll of parchment titled, "10 Reasons the Goblin Revolution of 1493 Was Important."

"James _was_ acting a bit odd just now," Sirius said thoughtfully.

"Maybe he went to chase Lily," Peter offered, in a stunning display of originality.

"Yeah, that's it," agreed Sirius, cheerfully helping himself to more eggs, the mystery settled as far as he was concerned.

Remus, observant as he was, thought it best not to point out that Lily was sitting with her friends at the far end of the Gryffindor table, decidedly unbothered by James. And Remus, being the bright boy that he was, had a sudden flash of insight…

The Marauders, minus James (who'd had Arithmancy while the other three were at Muggle Studies), were heading to lunch, Remus shyly letting Sirius hold his hand, when James appeared. He was out of breath, as if he'd run to catch them, and after seeing Remus' and Sirius' linked hands, he blanched and looked away.

"Uh, P-Padfoot?" he said, in a voice two octaves higher than usual. "Can I talk to you for a second?"

Sirius glanced at the other two Marauders – only rarely were there secrets among the four. "Sure, Prongs…"

Looking relieved, James grabbed Sirius by the arm and pulled him off into the throng of students, leaving behind a confused Peter and a worried Remus – his suspicions had been confirmed.

"Uh, you go on, Wormtail – I just remembered I've got to go see McGonagall – wanted to go over that last test – see you…" Remus dashed after the two black-haired boys, still trailing excuses.

James pushed Sirius into the nearest vacant classroom, then quickly closed the door behind them.

"You all right, mate?" Sirius asked as James shifted his weight between feet, refusing to meet the other boy's eyes.

"Um, yeah, listen, Padfoot…" James shifted his weight faster and messed up his already-mussed hair. "About – about you and, er, Moony…"

Sirius raised his eyebrows. "That's what this is about? Honestly, Prongs, it's never bothered you before. I don't know why it's different just because this is me and Moony."

"No," James protested. "It's not like _that_, Padfoot! It's –"

"What?" Sirius prodded.

"This." In one motion, James closed the distance between himself and Sirius, and kissed him, first uncertainly, then, when Sirius showed no signs of pushing him away, more heatedly. When he finally flicked Sirius' lips with his tongue, Sirius willingly opened his mouth and allowed James to deepen the kiss. As they pulled away, Sirius could only stare at James – jet black hair sticking up everywhere, piercing blue eyes catching the pale sunlight, tan face flushed – so dark and intense, so unlike Remus in every way. And when James leaned in again, Sirius, in spite of himself, returned the kiss.

Remus had tracked his friends to the empty classroom without any trouble. He had listened through the door, extra-sensitive wolf ears catching every word, and when all went silent, he froze. But the silence stretched out longer and longer until Remus couldn't stand it – in one swift movement, he swung the door open – to reveal his two best friends (one of them practically his boyfriend) with their tongues down each other's throats, hands wrapped in each other's hair, pressed against each other, eyes closed. Neither of them had heard the door silently open, and the kiss ended only when Remus cleared his throat pointedly. The startled boys sprang apart and stared guiltily at their friend.

Sirius spoke first. "Moony, I can explain –"

But Remus felt, all at once, two emotions rising in him: first betrayal, then a cold, hard anger. And he snapped. "_Can_ you, Sirius? Well, sorry but I don't particularly care for any explanations right now. For Christ's sake, we haven't been together a whole day and you're already snogging other people behind my back? And not just _any_ other people – oh, no, you're snogging _James_!"

James and Sirius looked dumbstruck at mild-mannered Remus' tirade.

Remus continued, more softly, "I'm sorry, Sirius, but I'm going to need a lot more than an _explanation_ if I'm ever going to trust you. And _you_," he whirled on James, who cringed and looked appropriately shameful. "Don't even get me _started_ on you, James." The young werewolf turned and fled before they could see the tears welling in his eyes, leaving James and Sirius alone once more.

James finally seemed to come to his senses. "Pads… I'm sorry, I, uh, don't suppose I should've done that. I just – needed you to know…" he finished lamely.

Sirius stared at James for a minute. "I've got to go after him, James. I'll see you later."

James watched Sirius' retreating back and swore loudly. "Perfect, just bloody perfect…"

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**A/N:** Yup, it gets even more soap-opera-ish in the next chapter... Thank you, dahlings, for the reviews that I _know_ you're going to leave!


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:** I'm back! Not many reviewers for chapter 2 (ahem), but here goes the next chapter in hopes that all you lovely people who have bookmarked this fic (and I know you're out there) will return... Enjoy!

**WARNING:** Slash. Duh. Enough said.

**Disclaimer:** The Marauders do not belong to me. If you think that they do, I know a good psychiatrist for you.

ooooooo

Sirius found Remus, quite predictably, in their dormitory, although he'd locked the curtains around his bed so that Sirius couldn't get in.

"Moony?" Sirius called softly, tugging on the curtains. "Come on, please, let me in, we can talk, you can yell at me, whatever, I know I deserve it…" There was no response. "Moony, Remus, please, I know you're in there. Just five minutes, then I'll leave you alone, okay?"

The curtains opened, grudgingly, just enough so that Sirius could crawl through before they snapped shut again. Remus sat on his bed, pillow hugged to his chest. Giving Sirius a death-glare that would have been a lot more menacing if his eyes hadn't been red and puffy.

"Thanks, Moony," Sirius said brightly, to no effect. "Right, okay. Listen, I know you're upset – rightfully so, I might add – but please believe me when I say that James initiated it. I know that's no excuse, and it doesn't help really because I did go along with it. But… _you're_ the one I want, Moony. It's _you_ I'd rather be with, if you'll let me."

Remus finally spoke, his voice bitter and cold. "How do I know you won't let James drag you into a broom closet and ravage you next time, or the time after that? You were obviously enjoying yourself, I don't know why I didn't see it earlier. I don't fit into the plan anywhere, do I? James Potter and Sirius Black: best friends, partners in crime, lovers –"

"Moony!" Sirius gasped.

"Sirius, you have to just understand – there are people who leave and people who get left. I should think you'd know which category I fall into. I knew last night was too good to be true… will you _go_ and leave me alone already?"

Sirius sighed. "Fine, but I _will_ be back. I'm not leaving you, Moony."

ooooo

That evening, after some long and tense hours of doing homework in the Common Room, James yawned and headed for the dormitory. Several minutes later, Remus wordlessly followed him. He found Remus about to slip under the covers with Quidditch Through the Ages in hand.

"Prongs," Remus said amiably, grinning a bit maniacally as James regarded him uncertainly. It seemed that, in the rare event that Remus got really angry, his pent-up emotions seized the opportunity to make a splendid show.

"Moony…"

"I just thought I'd tell you, Prongs," Remus went on, smiling even wider, "what I think of you right now. This –" He lunged forward and caught James' face between his hands, leaned in and sealed their mouths together. Remus' kiss was ferocious, wolf-like; instead of prodding James' mouth with his tongue, Remus bit the other boy's lip until he tasted blood "– is what I think of you, James Potter," Remus finished, upon drawing back. Without another word, Remus walked to his bed and yanked the hanging shut behind him, leaving in his wake a shocked James wiping blood from his mouth.

ooooo

The next morning, James overslept. When he work up, fifteen minutes before the first class of the day, the dorm was empty except for Sirius, who was sitting on James' bed like he'd been waiting (which he had, in fact, been doing).

"Glad you're awake," Sirius remarked casually. "I was getting worried I'd have to wake you myself, and that never works out very well, does it?" The last time he'd woken James, James had hexed Sirius into the bathroom before he woke up enough to realize what he was doing.

"Why're you here?" James asked, a bit grumpily. "Why aren't you at breakfast?"

"I wanted to talk to you," Sirius replied, grinning.

"Oh?" James looked a bit nervous. "Look, about yesterday – I really shouldn't have –"

"Yes, you should have," Sirius interrupted. "I thought about it last night. A lot. Yesterday – I _liked_ yesterday, Prongs."

"You – _what_?"

Sirius didn't explain further, but pushed James back onto the bed and proceeded to kiss him everywhere that his mouth could reach.

"Padfoot! What – what about – Moony?" James gasped as Sirius' hand slipped below the elastic band of his boxers.

"Shh," Sirius admonished. "Moony doesn't want me anymore."

"What!" James sat up very suddenly. "Sirius Black, you know perfectly well that that is total and complete bullshit. I –" James broke off and moaned as Sirius pressed against him. "Oh my… god. Sirius!"

Sirius grinned quite naughtily and removed his hand. "Sorry, mate, what were you saying?"

James glared at him. "You can't do that to me!"

"Sure I can. And I can do a lot more, besides. Just watch."

Closing his eyes, James gave up and surrendered to Sirius' caresses. After all, wasn't this what he'd wanted all along?

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**A/N:** You all know the drill: lots of reviews means my muse is happy and the next chapter is long and prompt. :)


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N:** Heeey! Sorry it's been so long, guys, but I'm back with the longest chapter yet! Thank you, everyone who reviewed - I love you all! And I promise, I'm determined not to abandon this fic... It will be finished!

**Disclaimer:** I'm not JKR. I hope you realize that.

**WARNING:** Ye gods, I hope that if you've got this far, you realize that this fic is chock full of slash.

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Transfiguration that morning was an icy affair, seeing as only Peter would speak openly to anyone of the other three. McGonagall, either oblivious to the heightened sexual tension in the air (unlikely – nothing got past the Transfiguration professor) or, more likely, choosing to ignore it, paired up Sirius with Peter and James with Remus to practice turning hedgehogs into pincushions.

Remus, who went first with his and James' hedgehog, was doing quite well – the little animal had stopped moving and was turning a lovely shade of blue, with a Provencal print – when he happened to look up and see Sirius across the room. Peter was using the hedgehog, so Sirius was lounging in his chair, staring over in Remus' and James' direction – no, staring at _James_. And, to make matters even worse, James was staring _back_ at Sirius, who ever-so-subtly winked and licked his lips. James, presumably in response, went slightly pink in the cheeks. Remus was shocked – James Potter _never_ blushed, _ever_. Remus didn't realize how angry – and, all right, jealous – he was until his hedgehog exploded, sending quills and shards of glass (no one could figure out where those had come from) flying across the room and leaving a strong smell of burning rubber in the air.

While a startled Remus was still trying to work out what had just happened, Professor McGonagall descended upon him, absolutely livid. "Mr. Lupin! May I ask how it did not reach your attention that you were _engorging_ your hedgehog instead of _transfiguring_ it? Is it so much to ask that you simply _concentrate_ on the task at hand for a few short moments? Really! I –"

Here she was interrupted by a violent coughing fit from James, who had been growing steadily more flushed as Sirius had taken advantage of McGonagall's distraction to make increasingly suggestive and obscene gestures in his directions.

"And _you_, Mr. Potter!" she snapped, whirling on James. "I suggest you pay more attention to memorizing the correct incantation and corresponding wand movement, instead of staring like a lovesick girl at Mr. Black!" She glowered at Remus and James (who was now positively fluorescent pink) and stalked back to the front of the room, muttering so that Remus barely heard it, "I expected better from you two," then, more loudly, "Detention with me tonight. Both of you. Be here at nine o'clock and no later."

ooooo

The rest of the day passed rather awkwardly. Remus ate lunch in the library, while James and Sirius vanished together (possibly to the broom closet on a relatively deserted sixth floor corridor) and Peter flirted, or at least attempted to flirt, with a pretty Hufflepuff as he covered his hurt at his friends' disappearance.

At precisely 8:50 that evening, Remus gathered his books and bid goodnight to the librarian as he left the library (where he'd remained all day except for during class time). Five minutes later, James hastily zipped up his pants, tried to finger-comb his hair, and straightened his robes as he left the prefects' bathroom (A/N: wink wink). The two boys converged at exactly 8:59 outside the door of Professor McGonagall's classroom, where they eyed each other uneasily before Remus darted inside ahead of James.

McGonagall was sitting regally at her desk, grading papers. As the boys entered, she put down her quill, stored the papers in her desk, and stood up before looking at them. "All right, boys," she said, "Tonight you are going to take care of the lesson you both seem to have missed today. I want you, first, to practice the incantation as long as it takes you to get it correctly – at the least, for half an hour. Then, you are to transfigure hedgehogs –" she flicked her wand and two sat on the desk before her "– into pincushions and back. I will return at exactly quarter of twelve, and I expect you both to demonstrate for me perfectly. Understand?" The boys nodded as McGonagall made for the door, where she paused. "Take care to do as I've instructed – I _will_ be able to tell if you haven't practiced."

When the door clicked shut, Remus and James pointedly faced away from each other and stood in awkward silence for a moment before Remus slowly drew his wand. "Right," he muttered, more to himself than to the other boy, and began to practice the complex wand motions,

James watched him out of the corner of his eye. "What're you _doing_?" he asked at last. "You're not actually going to practice for three hours, are you? You _know_ how to transfigure a hedgehog!" Remus didn't look up. "Fine, then. Go ahead, waste your time. See if I care."

"And what are my other options, James?" Remus said suddenly, voice low and cold. "Talk to _you_ until McGonagall returns? No _thank_ you, I'd much rather practice a spell I've had down since fourth year."

James flinched, a bit taken aback. "Remus – you _kissed_ me –"

"Yes, I did. _Brilliant_ powers of deduction you've got, if it only took you this long to figure that one out."

"Why, though?"

"Jesus Christ, I don't know!" Remus threw down his wand and whirled around to look James in the eye. "Why did you kiss Sirius? Why did _he_ kiss _you_? Who really gives a shit at this point? All that matters is you, James Potter, have single-handedly destroyed the _best_ fucking thing in my life before it even happened! Christ!"

James stared dumbfounded at the usually-quiet boy, who was now panting and red-faced and looking ready to burst into tears at any second. "Gods, Remus," he said softly, sounding genuinely surprised, contrite and shocked – either at his friend's outburst or at his own recent behavior. "I swear, I honestly never meant –"

"Yeah, well you bloody did it anyway, didn't you!" Remus exclaimed, voice wavering on the edge of hysteria. Suddenly something seemed to break inside him and he slumped into his chair, dropping his face into his hands and letting the sobs come. Everything that he'd felt building up for the last two days – pure joy and contentment at being with Sirius; anger and disbelief at catching him and James snogging; and betrayal, resentment and finally depression at realizing that Sirius at returned James' advances – just poured out in a blood of desperation and hopelessness.

James, looking at Remus, couldn't help wanting to take the smaller boy in his arms and hold him, comfort him. Remus looked so forlorn, so innocent and vulnerable. So, going against his better judgment, he did exactly that.

As soon as he touched Remus, James felt him freeze. "What – are – you doing?" Remus whispered, as his sobs subsided to sporadic sniffles.

"Oh, shut up and just relax, will you?" James murmured back, stroking Remus' fine hair.

For whatever reason, Remus actually obeyed and buried his face in James' shoulder. When he finally began to regain some of his usual self-control, Remus dared to lift his head and meet James' eyes. They were unreadable, hidden in the shadow his hair cast over his face, so Remus did the logical thing and brushed James' fringe back. At once, his eyes turned a bright hazel in the light, glittering and full of – something Remus didn't, or didn't want to, recognize.

As James began to lean toward him, Remus found that he stopped breathing. Then James' mouth found his, quite differently from their last kiss. This one was soft and tentative and halting. Their noses bumped together and their foreheads touched, and Remus couldn't help but think how different this was from Sirius' kisses. Sirius liked to be in charge, to dominate – not that Remus minded, really, but his kisses were always so fierce and energetic and passionate. They left Remus gasping and lightheaded. But _this_, this made his heart beat just a little faster as his cheeks got slightly hot, and he never missed oxygen until James pulled away and spots swam in Remus' eyes. James grinned. Remus, to his own surprise, smirked back and kissed James again.

At 11:30, Remus came to his senses to find himself pinned on a desk with James leaning over him, both of their shirts in a pile on the floor, their hair mussed, lips red and swollen. Remus stopped in the middle of fumbling with James' fly when it occurred to him. "McGonagall's coming back soon," he mutterd to James, vaguely aware that they ought to do something about it, but too sleepy and comfortable to really pursue the thought.

James unbuttoned Remus' pants. "That's okay. We both know how to transfigure hedgehogs."

Before Remus could reply, he found his mouth otherwise occupied. "Mmm," he protested, wrapping his arms around James' neck to pull him closer. "Wait," he gasped, holding James away from him. "Really, Prongs. Do you want her to walk in on this?" Because I really don't."

James sighed and stood up. "You're right…"

Slowly, each boy redid his pants, pulled on his shirt and rearranged the desks to how they'd looked two hours ago. By the time Professor McGonagall entered the room, they were seated at desks on opposite sides of the classroom, lazily transfiguring hedgehogs into pincushions with bored expressions.

The professor watched their work for a moment, then nodded. "Very well. You may go, and I trust neither of you will be interrupting my class again."

James and Remus mumbled goodbye as quickly as possible, and hurried into the hall. "Remus…" James was suddenly self-conscious and began to doubt what he'd done during their detention.

Remus, however, appeared to have no such reservations. "Prongs," he replied, smiling sweetly. He felt as though his world had just been put back together, and nothing was about to get in the way of his natural high.

James looked at him and couldn't bring himself to say anything other than, "What about Sirius?"

"Sirius who?" Remus responded, kissing James on the cheek and grabbing his hand.

James squeezed Remus' hand. Even Sirius had never made him feel peaceful. "Exactly."

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**A/N: **Get reviewing, then!


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